What did the Puritans have for dessert? Did they pay $25.00 for an activated charcoal milkshake? Did they have vodka infused cherries with their dairy-free frozen treats?
Their sweet-based mainstays were apple pies, yeast cakes, pastries, gingerbread, and biscuits. A few Puritans baked witch cakes made with rye flour or cornmeal, a pinch of ashes, and the urine of those afflicted by witchcraft. They fed those sinful puppies to the dogs as a test! A test that was supposed to expose witchcraft. Maybe it did?
Side note—Witch Cake should be an all-girl vaporwave metal band.
What a unique way to use a treat! I can think of another terrifying choice for sugar:
What did the Puritans think of abortions? Oddly enough, they were a non-taboo part of Puritan life. Abortions were legal up until quickening. In other words, until the mother felt a kick, which is typically anywhere between 14-26 weeks.
Puritans and witches alike shot guns and had homeopathic abortions. Neither act was considered controversial. They both were just real simple. Like dessert!
Witch Cake and the Shotgun Homeopathic Abortions would be a great psychobilly punk band name.